The problem isn’t that we don’t know this. We know we are here to live our own lives, on our own terms. We are not here to be led by the nose. Nor are we here to live out our parents’ dreams or be the dream for our spouse.
We do know we are not here to be told what to do.
But we get scared and we want to be told. Because we think, this is how we can avoid pain, loss, and suffering.
Or we’ve been punished for doing it our way.
Or we don’t want to deal with the consequences of being different, not meeting someone’s expectations.
So many of us are simply explaining (which morphs into more defending) something that we understand from our inner core. And not by any stretch of logic. We know, we just can’t explain it.
We also live in a society that measures and rewards success in specific ways. Groomed to fear the loss of support, etc. It makes sense since we’re living in a very materialistic and tribal age, this Cross of Planning global cycle.
How many times have kids been told what to study, what they cannot be, or “that’s not what good people do”, etc?
Some of our fear is biological. We are vulnerable as mortal beings, so far removed from our instincts. I mean, maybe in times of crisis and emergency, some of that are put to the test and we learn yes, hey, we can take care of ourselves. We do know which way to run, or head to. Just like the elephants. Mostly, we don’t know and we get hurt easily. We can feel pain intensely.
One of the worst conditioning is the belief that we have to figure it out by a certain age.
It – what work to do, who we are, what kind of person we are, our mission this life, our purpose, life itself. Why are we here?
Wow, what a burden to place on kids. And ourselves. To have it figured out, enough to choose a major in college, enough to adult it before their Saturn Return (around 28-30), enough to navigate our Uranus Opposition…
And to figure it out with our mind. Gah!
Our mind is powerful. It’s wonderful. Wondrous. It is rather a miracle.
What it can’t figure out are all these things, which unfold over time as we walk our path.
The mind also cannot see our path.
In Human Design, there are concepts that explain why that is. The mechanics of life.
When at age 30, 40, or even 50, and we haven’t figured it out, we feel like failures, we get labelled as failures. We feel like we’ve let everyone down – ourselves, our spouse (if we have one), our parents, our boss, our kids..our cat.
We know we aren’t here to be told what to do.
And many of us are not even wired to figure it out with our mind. We don’t have a strategic mind and the more we try, the more it hurts and the more frustrated, bitter, angry, and disappointed we feel. It can be a downward spiral and understanding this can be so profound. This is a reason I do love Human Design. It shows how a good portion of the population are different, why we are different, and that the role models we see out in the world just are not for us.
We know we are here to live as who we are.
In a crunch, in a crisis, when you’re so exhausted from living from who you are not, who you think you are/need to be/should be, who you’ve been conditioned to be, the who with all the masks, do you truly believe that? Or do you succumb just a little, to get some of the benefits society provides?
It takes incredible courage and self love to walk our own path. To trust that the path will appear as we walk it. And not to heed others’ dissenting calls, ridicule, and heckling from the back of the room and stay on path.
And also enough humility to heed good guidance.